I Hate Mosquitoes (The Worst Day Ever)!

Ever had a day where everything went wrong? Well I sure did. I all started when I lost my truck keys… in Utah Lake… for the second time…

Things actually started off pretty well. On Thursday evening me and a handful of friends headed out to Utah Lake for some tubing and R&R. Everything went fine until we headed back in. When we reached the harbor in Provo I discovered that my tuck key was missing. Not necessarily a big deal, but I had already lost my other truck key (in the lake) the previous week.  A boat in the Provo harbor, no truck key, no extra key, no way to park my boat- frustrating.

We scoured the boat for my key. I had emptied my pockets when we launched and I was certain it  had to be on the boat. Needless to say the key never turned up. We docked the boat as best we could and attempted to formulate a plan. Meanwhile the mosquitoes were starting to bite…

Tom suggested attaching the boat trailer to his SUV so we could get it out of the water. The SUV was at his house so he went to get it. I puled the boat trailer off my truck and felt relieved that things weren’t more complicated. The mosquitoes were getting pretty bad. We had found some bug repellent in the boat so I doused myself again. When Tom came back we realized that we’d need to transfer the hitch over to his SUV. Sadly it was locked onto my truck. After many minutes of trying every boat key I had I realized that I was somehow missing the key I needed to unlock the hitch. Two missing keys. Nuts.

Jim called his parents-in-law and they were gracious enough to offer assistance. They were in Spanish Fork so it was about a half hour before they could come get us. I was wet, cold, embarrassed and covered with mosquitoes. Since the boat covers were locked in the truck we had to tow the boat back to Lehi without them (cringe). Since dinner had not been available dockside we stopped at Wendy’s on the back  It was closed. The freeway was also closed becuase of a rather severe accident so we took Geneva road (long and bumpy!).  When we finally made it home I showered and collapsed in bed. I felt kind of itchy, but it was going to have to wait.

Around ten the next morning I was woken up when all three of our maids came into my bedroom. I groggily opened my eyes and sat up. One of them shrieked and they all ran, giggling, from the room. An inauspicious start to the day. As I came to my senses I remembered that my truck was in Provo and I had to find some way to get it home. The itching was getting worse. I felt very sick. Allergies or a cold- they could be nearly indistinguishable. I rubbed my eyes- oh no… my contacts were still in. I pried them out but my eyes were bloodshot and stung like a wasp. My glasses were missing so I had to put my contacts back in- ouch. I made my way to work and Fran called our favorite locksmith.

They said making a new key was complicated, but possible, expensive and very time consuming. They would call us as soon as they could squeeze us in- but we had to be at their shop within 20 minutes of their call and then take them to the truck. Standby. I hate standby. I was about to each lunch when a customer came in. After the customer left I was about to eat lunch when the locksmith called. We met them at their shop in American Fork and they followed us to Provo. We arrived at the truck and our locksmith hit us with some bad news: he had forgotten something kind of fundamental to making the key- namely the key template. He had to go back to the shop. “At lest you have something nice to look at.” he said gesturing at the the lake.

I was hungry. We had some time on our hands so we went to Saigon Cafe to pick up some food. The order was wrong. My kids all decided the were hungry again (I shared). My little girl, Claire, stepped on the take out box and dumped the food out. A bee flew over and stung me. No sign of the locksmith. I was really itching. My wife had some calamine lotion, but it had dried into a chalky powder.

Over an hour later the locksmith finally came back (he’d stopped on the way down to do another job). Finally it was time to start making our key. It was going to take another hour. I sat in the grass (it was wet) and built a little house out of sticks. I wished that I lived in the little house… until my kids smashed it, that is. Anyway- the locksmith finally got the key made. He pointed out some imperfections in it (“Really hard key to make!” he said), and explained that it would “break in.” That’ll be $300. Fine by me- my ordeal was coming to an end. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel…

…but I would have the mosquito bites- over two hundred on my arms, legs, head and back- to remind me of my worst day ever…


11 thoughts on “I Hate Mosquitoes (The Worst Day Ever)!

  1. BTW considering your propensity for losing your keys you may want to consider doing what Jas did. He made a bunch of copies of his car key and gave them to some of his close friends. Then when he locked his keys in his car he could just call one of them and they could bale him out. It worked out quite nicely.

  2. Sadly my Tacoma features “Smart Keys,” keys with a computer chip that transmits a code to the lock out system in my truck and allows it to start. $80 a pop. Still… not a bad idea.

  3. When I read your story, I was absolutely floored. You have THREE maids!!? Do they do dishes too? I hate to be a “one-upsmanship” guy, turningthis into a comparative me-fest, (but I’m going to anyway) on my very BEST day, I live in a 1000sqft townhouse in the murder capitol of the world. My worst days involve me being covered head to toe in the blood and solid waste (duce) of a person with HIV, and the whole alphabet of viral hepatitis. I speak of myself here only to argue that it isn’t the worst day ever, it could have been worse… maybe… on the other hand you may have also caught something from mosquitos (Babediosis: the American mans Malaria). well, I have written enough now that I’m certain this comment won’t be posted (Ive been a victem of Cam-censorship before)! Good post though. Keep em coming.

  4. OUCH!!! I don’t even know what 200+ mosquito bites would even feel like?? Especially since I only get 1-2 bites an entire summer!
    The key idea really worked well for me. If I locked out my keys I knew Rowley, Jeremy, or any number of random people would have a spare key. It was always the best when Rac and I were eating dinner and had to call Rowley to come and join us because I locked my keys in my car.

  5. Got West Nile then? Don’t worry, it only kills children and old people.

    I’m beginning to think I got more bites that night than I know. Some people react badly to mosquito bites, my son John for instance swells up pretty good. Not life-threateningly bad, just alarmingly. I rarely react badly.

    Someone mentioned your truck shutting itself off after 30 minutes. What’s that about?

  6. It sure sounds like you had a really rough day. Those pictures are some of the worst injuries I have seen in my short 29 years. Thank goodness sake for Jim and Tom (especially Tom). Allergies and a cold ARE indistinguishable (they must be the same thing lol. lol. lol.). That locksmith needs a lesson in customer service. I too have been bit by a mosquito. I dont know who Andrew is.. but 30 minutes shutting off on your truck sounds nasty! I am excited to hear your reply to his posting. Go BYU.

  7. So, let me explain the maid thing for Dave- we sort of have three maids. It’s really one maid and she brings two helpers with her so she can finish faster. Dishes, yes. I guess my day could have been worse if I was covered in blood… not my blood. Some HIV blood from a bum maybe. Sick.

    As for West Nile- I think I escaped unharmed. I wish I was one of the folks who reacted well to mosquito bites. I’m into my final stage now- they have all blistered and scabbed over. Hooray!


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